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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/23682592">Desired</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/Jld71/pseuds/Jld71'>Jld71</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Supernatural RPF</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Amputation, Bottom Jensen Ackles, Car Accidents, Hesitant Jensen, Hurt Jensen Ackles, Loss of Limbs, M/M, Oral Sex, Self-Conscious Jensen, Service Dogs, Top Jared Padalecki, Wheelchairs</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-04-16</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-04-16</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-02 16:22:04</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Explicit</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>3,547</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/23682592</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/Jld71/pseuds/Jld71</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>After recovering from an accident that took his legs, Jensen doesn’t think anyone would find him desirable.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>6</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>161</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Desired</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Do Not Re-Post Without My Written Permission - Only To Be Posted On My AO3 Or LiveJournal Accounts.</p><p>Written for the 2020 Masquerade Ball prompt: Dean or Jensen is missing two limbs, author's choice. Sam or Jared meets him and shows him how desirable he is. </p><p>Beta: firesign10</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>It had been a beautiful sunny day; the sounds of birds chirping and children playing had filled the air, only to be replaced with screaming, the crunch of tires on asphalt and the sickening sound of metal scraping against metal. Then everything went black. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>When Jensen woke, he heard the unfamiliar sounds of beeping, along with a woman speaking to him, telling him he had been in an accident, that he was lucky to be alive and the child he had pushed out of the way from the oncoming car had only suffered minor cuts and bruises. It had been a drunk driver who had mistaken the gas pedal for the brake that had changed his life forever. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Jensen was being hailed as a hero. He didn’t feel much like a hero. He didn’t feel much at all. He was engulfed with numbness as he sat in his wheelchair, staring down at where his legs had been. They had been too mangled for the doctor to save. And in order to save his life, the doctor had made the decision to amputate. Part of him wished the doctor hadn’t bothered. He rubbed his hands on the arms of his chair, avoiding touching what was left of his legs; his left leg had been taken just above the knee while his right leg had been taken just below the knee. He huffed at that, why bother leaving anything? Why bother saving what had been left? Why bother saving him at all? He would never be the man he once was. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>After recovering from his surgery, Jensen had managed to find an apartment building with a ramp, elevator, and an apartment that had ample room for him to move around in his wheelchair. He was actually lucky, if you could call it that, to have found a first-floor apartment that also had a patio so he could venture outside for fresh air, but also sheltered him from prying eyes. He had yet to come to terms with the changes to his body and the challenges he now faced. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>A knock at his door pulled Jensen from his thoughts. His eyes flicked to the clock and he shook his head. His next-door neighbor was punctual, if nothing else. Well actually, Jared was more than that. He was a tall, good-looking, red-blooded man with chestnut-colored hair, sun-kissed skin, kaleidoscope hazel eyes, broad shoulders, muscular arms, chiseled chest, a fine ass and long legs. Jared was just his type. Jared would be the man he could see himself with, if he was still whole. But he wasn’t, and he couldn’t see Jared wanting someone who was like him, not the way he was now. “Come in,” he called out as he tried to maneuver himself away from the French doors leading to the patio. He had just finished turning around when Jared closed the door.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Hey, Jensen. How ya doing today?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Jensen shrugged his shoulders non-committedly. “Okay, I guess. Can’t complain. I mean, I could, but who wants to listen?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“You know you can talk to me, right? I mean, I’m willing to listen.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Jensen offered Jared a smile and was about to thank him when he was saved by the sound of nails clicking against the wood floor and then an excited woof. “Someone’s happy to see you,” he said instead, taking the spotlight off himself. He noticed the smile on Jared’s face fall a little, but forced himself not to dwell on it. It didn’t mean anything. It couldn’t, could it? Jared was just a nice, friendly guy. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Crouching down, Jared waited for Jensen’s service dog, Gunner, to run over to him. “Hey, boy, how are you today?” He patted the dog on the head and scratched behind his ears before standing up. “Ready for your walk?” He was met with an excited bark and chuckled in response. “I’ll take that as a yes.” Looking over at Jensen, Jared frowned. The man was gorgeous; tousled reddish-brown hair, piercing green eyes, long dark lashes, pale skin, cinnamon-colored freckles, and pink and sensual lips. Perfection as far as he thought. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Yes, he saw that Jensen was in a wheelchair, and he knew the reason why. How Jensen had sacrificed his own body to save the life of a child. How Jensen’s legs had been crushed on impact when the drunk driver’s car had hit him. Everyone knew the story; it had made headlines of the newspapers and been the topic of the six o’clock news for a time after the accident, and then again during the driver’s trial. The man was currently serving an extremely long sentence, and as far as Jared was concerned, it would never be long enough. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>But he also saw past the chair that replaced Jensen’s legs. He saw a man. A man he wanted. It just seemed that Jensen wasn’t interested. Jared just wasn’t sure if Jensen wasn’t interested in him, or the prospect of a relationship. He was drawn from his thoughts by Gunner’s whine and Jensen’s husky chuckle.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Earth to Jared,” Jensen called. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Sorry,” Jared offered sheepishly as he stood. “Hey, it’s a beautiful day. Why don’t you join us? I’m sure Gunner would love to have you come along.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Is that your way of telling me you’re tired of walking my dog?” Jensen questioned as his eyes raked over Jared’s body. Damn, the man was built. He desperately wanted to bend over for Jared. He forced himself to tamp that thought down because there was no way he was ever bending over for Jared, or any other man ever again. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Looking at Jensen through his bangs, Jared tried to hide his shock. Did Jensen think he no longer wanted to take Gunner for his walk? “No, I just thought you might want to get out. You know, get some fresh air. You’re cooped up in here. It might be nice to feel the sun on your face.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“That’s why I have the patio,” Jensen replied as he hitched his thumb over his shoulder. “Look I really appreciate you taking Gunner out. He needs the exercise. If you don’t want to, I understand. I can arrange for a service rather than imposing it on you. I mean I’m sure your girlfriend isn’t too thrilled with you giving up an hour a day to take a neighbor’s dog for a walk.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>As he felt himself blush, Jared shook his head. “No girlfriend, not since middle school when I realized I was gay. And, no boyfriend. Besides, I thought we were more than neighbors. I thought we were friends, or on our way to becoming friends and possibly . . .” Whatever else he was about to say was cut off by Gunner’s sharp bark, indicating he had waited long enough for his walk. “Yeah, I hear you, Gunner,” Jared responded as he turned and grabbed the dog’s leash. “See you in about an hour,” he called over his shoulder as he led Gunner out for their daily walk. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Jensen admired Jared’s ass as he left and then let out a sigh. So, Jared was gay, not like that meant anything. Not like it would lead to anything between them. He liked Jared. He looked forward to his daily visits, and Jared didn’t look at him with pity. But he knew that in time Jared would find someone better suited to him. Not someone stuck in a wheelchair. He forced himself to move into the kitchen, needing to take care of Gunner’s water bowl and put out food for him. Then he had to make himself something to eat. He needed to keep up his strength. He gave a bark of bitter laughter at that thought, wondering what the point was. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>By the time Jared and Gunner returned, he had managed to make dinner. And he hadn’t managed to spill anything on himself. He was just getting the dishes out when he heard the two entering. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Easy, boy. You’re going to choke yourself,” Jared cautioned as he tried to get Gunner’s leash off him before he ran for Jensen and then his bowls. “We’re back,” he announced as Jensen made his way out from the kitchen.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I can see that,” Jensen confirmed with a chuckle. “So, I made dinner, enough for two, if you’re hungry. I’m not the greatest cook, but I can boil water. It’s nothing fancy, just pasta and sauce. You’re welcome to join me,” Jensen offered with a smile. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>A dimpled smile broke out over Jared’s face. “I’d love to, thanks. Do you need any help?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Jensen bit his bottom lip as he thought about Jared’s offer. Aside from Jared’s offer to walk Gunner, he tried not to rely on anyone. He did his best to be independent. He worked from home, but he had a wheelchair van for when he needed to leave, which was rarely since he could have just about everything he needed delivered. He just wasn’t sure how coordinated he’d be trying to serve dinner to Jared. “How about you serve and I’ll grab us some drinks? Beers okay with you?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Sounds good,” Jared confirmed, and then made sure to stay out of Jensen’s way until he was seated at the small dining room table before serving the dinner Jensen had made.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The night passed pleasantly for the two, the conversation flowed easily as did the beer. By the time they had finished their meal and cleaned up, they were both three beers in and Jared was feeling the liquid courage. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“So, you know I’m gay, can I ask about . . .”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>With a sly smile Jensen cut Jared off. “If I still had my legs, I’d be all over you. You’re the perfect guy for me.” His eyes widened in surprise and he slapped a hand over his mouth when he realized what he had said. He shook his head, trying to clear his alcohol clouded mind. “Sorry, that was inappropriate.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Forcing himself not to preen, and not willing to let Jensen’s words go, Jared spoke up, “What do you mean if you still had your legs?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“You don’t want to get involved with me. You don’t want someone who’s not whole,” Jensen spit out. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Not whole? Why would you say that? I happen to like what I see. The entire package definitely appeals to me.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Jensen shook his head and barked out a bitter laugh. “Yeah, right, because I’m so desirable the way I am now.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Pushing himself away from the table, Jared stood to his full height and closed the distance between them, never taking his eyes off of Jensen. He fought, and lost against giving Jensen a chance to move on his own, pulling Jensen away from the table. Licking his lips, he gave Jensen a heated gaze before leaning down and pressing his forehead against Jensen’s. “I can honestly say I want you. When I look at you, Jensen Ackles, I don’t see a man in a wheelchair, or a man, who as you put it, isn’t whole. I see a very good-looking man. I see you. I see someone who I want in my life, however you want to be in it. And right now, I see someone who deserves to be loved, and I want to make love to you.” He heard the hitch in Jensen’s breathing and used that opportunity to crash his lips against Jensen’s. When Jensen moaned against his lips, Jared snaked his tongue out to tangle it with Jensen’s.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Letting go of his fear, Jensen reached up and entwined his fingers in Jared’s hair. He moaned against Jared’s lips, and then sucked on Jared’s tongue when it darted into his mouth. When they broke away, panting for breath, he still had his fingers carding through Jared’s hair, not willing to let go for fear that this was all a dream. “God, Jared, I’ve wanted you since we first met. I just never dared to hope you wanted me, not how I am.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Jared nipped at Jensen’s bottom lip, stopping Jensen from saying anything further regarding his body. “I’m only going to say this once, I don’t want to hear any more bullshit about how you are. Now, tell me honestly, do you want me as much as I want you?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Yes,” Jensen managed to breathe out and then found himself being kissed again until his lungs screamed for air.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Pulling away from Jensen’s lips, Jared managed to catch his breath. “Good, now unless you want me to make love to you on the cold floor, something I’m not a fan of, we should probably move this into the bedroom.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Jensen nodded in agreement as he withdrew his fingers from Jared’s hair, careful not to pull on the silky strands. “Right, bedroom.” He bit his bottom lip as his cheeks began to flush in embarrassment. He pushed himself away from Jared, needing a moment to breathe. “About that . . . my bed . . .”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Jared quirked an eyebrow, “You do have a bed, right?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Yeeesss,” Jensen dragged the word out, trying to figure out how to explain to Jared that it wasn’t exactly a standard bed; it was a queen size bed with safety railings. He still needed the protection of the railings so he didn’t roll over and fall out of bed. Not able to meet Jared’s eyes, he looked down at his hands. “It’s not a regular bed. It’s got . . . it’s got safety railings, so I . . . so I don’t fall out of bed.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Oh, well, I’m sure we can work around that.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Jensen’s head snapped up at hearing Jared’s words. “You still want me?” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I can’t make it any plainer that I want you. I’ll hire a skywriter if that will help you,” Jared teased and then crouched down in front of Jensen, reached out and took Jensen’s hands in his. “I get that you’re scared. Don’t be. Just let yourself go and be with me.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Slowly Jensen nodded his head in agreement and then pulled his hands away. Without a word, he turned and started to make his way into his bedroom, but stopped to glance over his shoulder. “If you’re coming, make sure to close the door. I’m not interested in making this a threesome,” he said as he gave a pointed look at Gunner who was sitting a few feet away. “Gunner, to your bed.” Jensen heard Gunner give a soft whine before he followed his command. Satisfied that his dog was obeying for the moment, Jensen made his way into his bedroom. He was mid-transfer from his chair to the bed when he heard the bedroom door being closed. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Jared stood with his back pressed against the closed door as he waited for Jensen to get comfortable on the bed. Once Jensen was situated, he wasted no time scrambling to get next to him. Bracketing Jensen with his arms, he leaned down to kiss him. The kiss started off softly, quickly heating as their desire for each other amped up. “God, I’ve been wanting to kiss you since the first moment we met,” Jared murmured against Jensen’s lips before moving to trail kisses along his neck. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Taking both hands, he slid them under Jensen’s t-shirt pushing it up over his abdomen and chest so he was able to kiss from Jensen’s bellybutton to his nipples. He swirled his tongue around Jensen’s left nipple as his fingers played with the right one. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Jared,” Jensen moaned as he closed his eyes, enjoying what Jared was doing to him. He arched up into Jared’s mouth when Jared nibbled on his left nipple. He suddenly felt the need to be naked, wanting to feel Jared’s body against his own. “Too much clothing,” he whispered as he began to work his shirt over his head. He felt Jared’s hands on his, helping him remove his shirt and then he was reaching up, fisting Jared’s shirt, and pulling it off. He sucked in a breath when he saw Jared’s tan skin and then let out a gasp when he felt Jared’s warm flesh against his. He reached up and tangled his fingers in Jared’s hair, not wanting to break contact as Jared sucked his other nipple between his teeth. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Jared moaned around the hardening nub in his mouth. Reaching out, he took Jensen’s forgotten nipple between his fingers, rubbing it until it was pebbled again. He felt Jensen writhing under him and he smiled around the nipple in his mouth before letting it go with a wet pop. He trailed kisses down Jensen’s abdomen, stopping just above the waistband of his sweatpants. Looking up, he met Jensen’s heated gaze. “Can I?” He didn’t want to remove the rest of Jensen’s clothing without his permission, knowing how self-conscious Jensen was about his body. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Jensen let go of his hold on Jared when he moved down his body. He fisted the sheet as Jared trailed his lips lower and lower and bit his bottom lip, letting his eye slip closed as he enjoyed what Jared was doing to him. When he heard Jared speaking, asking permission, Jensen didn’t think twice about granting it. He felt Jared’s fingers working themselves under his clothing, pulling them down and off his body. His eyes shot open when he felt the loss of Jared’s warmth. Fearfully he looked up, thinking that Jared had pulled away from him in disgust when he saw what was left of his legs. He was met with lust-filled eyes as Jared worked his own pants off. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“So fucking beautiful. Mine, tell me you’re mine,” Jared begged.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Yes, Jared. God yes, I’m yours,” Jensen confirmed as Jared settled between his legs. He moaned in appreciation when Jared wrapped his fingers around the base of his cock, and then gasped when he felt Jared’s tongue lap at his leaking slit. He fought the urge not to buck his hips up when Jared swallowed him down. “Jared, not gonna . . . not gonna last long,” he panted out as he buried his fingers in Jared’s hair. His eyes rolled into the back of his head when Jared hummed around his cock. The sensation sent him over the edge, and he came spilling down Jared’s throat. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Gently, Jared worked Jensen through his orgasm before letting his softening cock slip from his lips. He heard Jensen moan, and he palmed his own throbbing cock. He desperately wanted to be inside Jensen, but he wasn’t sure if Jensen was ready for that. He heard Jensen speaking and he forced himself to listen to him rather than concentrate on his erection.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Thought you . . . thought you were gonna make love to me?” Jensen said between breaths and then groaned. “I don’t . . . I don’t have anything.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I have . . . I hoped,” Jared managed to admit and then bit his lip. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“What are you waiting for?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Jared didn’t need further coaxing. Grabbing his discarded pants, he fumbled around until he found the pocket he had stashed a condom and packet of lube in. Ripping open the condom he quickly worked it over his heated flesh and then set about his next mission, working Jensen open. When he was sure Jensen would be able to take him, he withdrew his fingers and pushed the head of his cock into Jensen’s tight heat. He let out a guttural groan as he rested, pelvis flush against Jensen’s ass. “You feel so good.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Fuck, Jared . . .  so big,” Jensen moaned as Jared breached him, thankful that Jared gave him time to adjust to taking all of his cock. “Move,” he breathed out when he was ready. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Jared set up a languid pace as he fucked into Jensen. Fighting the urge to wrap his arms around Jensen’s thighs, he rested his hands on either side of Jensen’s head, lowering himself so he could crash their lips together. Picking up his pace, he bit down on Jensen’s exposed neck as he thrust into him. He heard Jensen’s moans and felt Jensen reach up, grabbing onto his shoulder as he slammed into him. Having fought back his own orgasm in favor of making sure Jensen had been satisfied, he knew it wouldn’t be long before he came. He thrust once, twice and came with Jensen’s name spilling from his lips. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Slowly he pulled out of Jensen, careful not to cause him any discomfort and then fell onto his side, waiting for his breathing to return to normal. When he was sure he was able to stand, he pushed himself off the bed to dispose of the condom before making his way back to Jensen. He found Jensen lying on his side, with a smile on his face. He stood there, naked and uncertain as to what to do next. Did he climb back into bed like he wanted to, or did he get dressed and retreat to his own apartment?</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Are you just gonna stand there, or are you gonna get back in bed?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Bed, definitely getting back in bed,” Jared said as he joined Jensen. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Snuggling up to Jared, Jensen laid a hand on his chest. “So, what does this mean for us? Neighbors with benefits?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I was thinking more like boyfriends,” Jared said in an uncertain voice.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I like the sound of that,” Jensen admitted in a sleepy voice. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Kissing the side of Jensen’s face, Jared smiled, “Me, too.”</span>
</p>
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